Saturday, February 23, 2008

Social Anxiety

I'd like to say I don't have it but I'm afraid I do. Sometimes impending social interactions can send me into panic mode and this started about two years ago I'd say. It seems to be worse and worse as time goes by. Since moving away from everything I know the opportunity to actually be in social situations has decreased to almost a halt so I'm sure that isn't something that helps. There was someone I met a few months ago through an online mommies group. I met her out.It was supposed to be a group of six and I forced myself to go or I should say Joe forced me. We were the only two woman who showed up! After we ate we talked for over two hours about a lot of things.
It was nice to meet her I just wasn't sure.... We were different (which is ok) but I felt my financial and emotional circumstances would make it hard for us to be friends. She was originally from here and had lots of family and friends around. She was on disability and had been and they seemed to be stable financially. Basically, I made excuses because I didn't feel confident in myself. That is what I'm realizing slowly. She has reached out to me again and I am going to try to reach out as well. I was surprised to hear from her again-very surprised. Since Joe works a lot it would be nice to have another adult to talk to-a friend-that I could see in person-especially since my family seems to be very busy and phone calls to me seem so few and far in between. I think I just have a case of the lonelies and have been in a rut for over a month.The blah weather,knowing we won't see family until May,money,Joe working ALL the time-none of it helps-and are just excuses for inaction I know.I better log off before I depress anyone who happens to read my pity party :( Thanks for reading...

2 comments:

Karen said...

Ug, we've all been there. I tend to withdraw from people too when things get rough. I'm starting to realize, though, that it only makes things worse. Hang in there, Girl. And maybe take a leap of faith or two!! We rarely regret the times we've tried, but we often regret the times we didn't!

Minilegs said...

sorry you feel so anxious. I'm sure it will be nice to meet her and visit from time to time. I know I get that way just living 40 mins away from most people I know. I get in a rut and have a hard time getting out of it.